Choosing a Dildo
Dildos are a great way to add some fun and excitement to your sex life. As you probably know they come in a wide variety of sizes, shapes and colors, but not every dildo is right for every person in every situation. Choosing a dildo is more fun when you’re armed with the information you need to make the best choice. Maybe a small, colorful dildo would work best for you or your partner. Or maybe the power of a large, realistic vibrating dildo would better satisfy your desires. Whichever the case, the Body Vibes Dildo Guide is designed to give you the information you need to make the most informed dildo choice.
Dildo Basics:
Dildo Varieties and Uses
It’s no accident that dildos come in such a wide variety of shapes, sizes, colors and materials. There are about as many uses for dildos as there are people who use them. Some people like to use a dildo for vaginal play, while others prefer anal play. Some will share their dildo with a partner, while others will be the sole user. Certain materials are better suited for sharing with a partner and certain shapes are more appropriate for anal play. Each material gives a dildo a certain look and feel, and may have specific cleaning requirements. You can find out all of the specifics by reading further, but for now its good that you know that there ARE different materials, shapes, sizes and colors available, and that these differences may impact the usability of your dildo.
The first thing to determine is how you will be using the dildo. Do you plan on using it for vaginal penetration only, or is there a chance you might use it for anal play. Do you plan on sharing your dildo with a partner, or do you anticipate being the only user? Do you think you would like a soft, pliable material or would you be more into a harder and stiffer feel? Does the idea of using a realistic toy turn you on, or would you prefer to stick with a smaller, smooth dildo that doesn’t resemble a penis? Are you willing to spend a little extra time cleaning your dildo with warm water and mild soap or adult toy cleaner, or would you prefer to just scrub it down with dish soap and toss it in the drawer?
Once you’ve addressed these issues you’ll have the framework you need to choose the right dildo. You will be able to narrow down the options, making the search for the perfect dildo much easier.
Dildo Styles and Types
If you have even a rough idea of what you want a dildo to do for you, or how you would likely use a dildo, then the next step is to apply that knowledge. The “Dildo Styles and Types” section will help you do that. Each category outlines typical uses for those dildos that fall within it. Please keep in mind that there are likely more uses for each type of dildo – we simply couldn’t mention them all. So use the information as a guide, and feel free to use your imagination and creativity.
Traditional Dildos
Traditional dildos are very popular. They’re usually shaped like a penis, although each can vary with regards to how realistic it appears. On one end of the spectrum you have ultra-realistic dildos which are shaped and colored to look as close to a real penis as possible. In fact, some dildos are actually made from a mold of a real penis. Adult film actors have been lending their names (and their penises) for sex toy molding in recent years. On the other end of the spectrum you’ll find brightly colored dildos that don’t look anything like a penis. Traditional dildos fall into a range of arpimd 5-inches up to as much as 18-inches for some of the larger varieties.
Balls
Balls fall into the category of dildos if they are not attached to a motor. Unlike vibrating balls, the non-motorized versions do not require batteries and are not attached to an electric cord. One of the choices in this category is Ben Wa Balls. A set of Ben Wa Balls consists of two large, smooth ball bearings and are intended to be used by inserting them into the vagina. They work by stimulating internal areas when they rub or knock up against each other. The sensations from Ben Wa Balls are often very subtle and some women do not find them pleasurable. If you’re considering a set of Ben Wa Balls, you should consider whether you would find these subtle sensations pleasurable. Another type of ball is the Duotone Ball. Duotone Balls, like Ben Wa Balls, are ball bearings that are encased inside a larger plastic sphere, which is usually made of silicone. The two spheres are connected by a cord, which is used for easy retrieval. Duotone Balls work much the same way as Ben Wa Balls, but the sensations are much more intense because the inner ball bearings of the Duotone Balls have room to move, so they knock against the outer casing, or each other with more force. Duotone Balls can be used by either placing both balls inside the vagina, or by placing one inside and letting the other ball hang out.
Beads
Beads appeal to a wide variety of people and are a popular choice for anal play. Beads consist of a series of silicone, jelly or plastic spheres attached together by a cord. They are inserted one by one into the vagina or anus, and then slowly removed creating pleasurable sensations.
Anal Dildos
Anal Dildos are specifically designed for anal use. They are distinguished from all other dildos because they have a flared base or cord so they don’t get lost in the anus – an amusing but very common occurrence. If you plan on using a dildo anally, we would recommend getting one that’s designed for that purpose.
Double-Sided Dildos
Double-sided dildos are dildos that can be used from both ends. This is a common choice for people who want to use a dildo on themselves and with a partner simultaneously. Double ended dildos can either be two standard dildos joined at the base, or one that is molded with two working ends. These dildos, like most other dildos, are available in a wide variety of shapes, sizes and colors.
Realistic Dildos
Realistic dildos are designed to look like he real thing. Most are flesh-tone in color and several models are available in “light”, “medium” and “dark” to suit individual tastes. They can, depending on the material that they’re made of, also feel very realistic. There are several materials that are designed to mimic the feel of skin. Among them, Cyberskin, UR3 and New Skin seem to be the favorites.
Strap-On Dildos
Strap-on Dildos are dildos that can be attached, if desired, to a harness. Harnesses usually require that the dildo have a flat or flared base to stay attached during use. The dildo is inserted through a hole in the harness, and the harness is then strapped to the user. The exception to this rule is the Vac-U-Lock Harness. This harness comes with a “plug” which accepts specially designed dildos that have a hole at the base. The vacuum created when the plug is inserted into the hole is enough to keep the dildo in place.
Dildo Materials
On one hand you have silicone, which is soft, flexible and almost lifelike to the touch. On the other hand you have plastic, which is hard, inflexible and (as you can imagine) does not feel like human skin. So why are there so many material choices?
The type of material you choose will depend on the particular feel you’re going for. If you want a lifelike feel you would probably want to choose a dildo made from either Cyberskin or silicone. Both materials are soft and smooth like skin, but each has very different care requirements. Cyberskin is delicate and requires special care while silicone is extremely durable – you can run a silicone toy through the dishwasher without ruining it (although we don’t recommend it). If you’re not too concerned with having the most realistic feeling dildo you would do well with either plastic or jelly. Plastic dildos are usually hard and inflexible, while jelly dildos are typically soft and pliable. Again – your choice of materials will depend on your needs and desires.
We think the most important thing is to find a toy that you like. Whether it ends up being plastic, silicone, jelly or any other material may be secondary. We think it’s useful, however, to be familiar with the different characteristics and cleaning requirements in advance. Some toys require special cleaning, and some are better suited for sharing with partners.
Plastic
Plastic is usually the material of choice for the outer casing of duotone balls. Plastic sex toys generally have hard, smooth exteriors and are inflexible. Cleaning is easy – all you need is a wet washcloth, some sex toy cleaner, or a tissue soaked in rubbing alcohol.
Silicone
Silicone is the second most lifelike material available, behind Cyberskin. Do you want your dildo to look and feel real? If so, silicone may be the way to go. Silicone tends to quickly absorb body heat and it retains the heat well, which adds to its realistic feel. Silicone also has a few advantages over its closest relatives, latex and jelly. It is an extremely rugged, high quality material and is very easy to clean. All you need is soap and hot water. Silicone is such a high quality material that non-mechanical silicone toys can actually be boiled or run through the dishwasher! Another benefit to silicone is its non-porous nature. It is less likely than latex and jelly to allow bacteria to grow, which means it’s less likely to spread germs between users. We always recommend using a condom when you share a dildo, but if you don’t, silicone might be the least likely to trap and spread germs. Due to the cost of silicone, these toys are generally more expensive than latex or jelly toys, but it is a higher quality material that generally will last longer. If you’re looking for a high quality, versatile dildo, you may want to consider silicone.
Jelly
Jelly dildos are close in look and texture to silicone, but are not quite as smooth and lifelike. Jelly is a great material for people who want the realistic feel of a silicone dildo but don’t want to pay the higher price for silicone. Jelly dildos can be a little bit stiffer than silicone dildos, but many silicone dildos are extremely soft to begin with. It’s just a matter of preference. Jelly can best be described as a soft and pliable material that feels smooth to the touch yet retains some rigidity. For many people the term “jelly” brings up images of strawberry preserves or a bowl of Jell-O. Jelly sex toys, however, are not as squishy as either of the two. Depending on the brand, the “softness” of jelly toys can range anywhere from the consistency of a hard-boiled egg to the consistency of a cold stick of butter (without the grease of course). On a related matter, jelly is more porous than silicone – so it isn’t wise to share a jelly dildo unless you use a condom. The best way to clean jelly dildos is with warm water. Never use rubbing alcohol to clean jelly, and always use water based lubrication – jelly will degrade if it is exposed to a non-water based lubricant or rubbing alcohol. If you decide on a jelly dildo, it might be a good idea to pick up some cleaner specifically designed for sex toys. The porous nature of jelly makes it harder to remove germs from the surface, but a good sex toy cleaner will kill any bacteria and leave a clean, fresh scent. A bit of soap and water will also work, but will not sterilize the surface.
Latex
Latex is a low cost alternative to silicone and jelly. Most dildos are made out of latex, which is soft, but still a bit less flexible than silicone and jelly. Are you unsure what type of dildo you would enjoy? Latex is a popular choice for people experimenting with different shapes and sizes. Latex does not last as long as silicone or jelly, and is quite porous and therefore not as easy to clean, but many people find latex dildos enjoyable and satisfying. If you plan on sharing a latex dildo, be sure to use a condom. Soap and warm water is the preferred way to clean a latex toy. If is also worth mentioning that some people have an allergic reaction to latex. If you or your partner is allergic to latex condoms, you might want to try a toy made of silicone or jelly.
Glass
Who would have thought? On the surface, the mere idea of a glass dildo may seem strange, even dangerous. However, glass dildos are popular items that are not only beautiful but safe. Glass dildos are usually made of Pyrex glass, which is an extremely strong, scratch and chip-resistant material. Heat-treated and examined with high tech equipment for scratches, cracks and other flaws, glass dildos are – according to the manufacturer – completely safe for intimate use. We have never heard of anyone being injured by a glass dildo. These works of art are more expensive than most other dildos, but they are extremely beautiful and highly functional.
Cyberskin
Cyberskin is the most recent technological advancement in sex toy materials. This material is considered to be the closest thing to the look and feel of real skin. It is smooth, soft, flexible, and feels very similar to skin. It is porous like latex and jelly, so it must be cleaned carefully with soap and warm water or with a Cyberskin cleaning solution.
UR3
Of all the realistic materials UR3 is probably the easiest to clean and care for. It is a relatively new material and is still being evaluated for durability, but so far it shows a lot of promise. It appears to be more durable than Cyberskin and therefore a bit easier to maintain. There is no doubt, however, that it looks and feels very similar to real skin.
Metal
Metal is not a common material, but one that exists. Metal dildos are similar to plastic ones, in that they have a hard, generally smooth exterior and are easy to clean.
Acrylic
Acrylic is a form of plastic as is considered a “specialty” material. Acrylic dildos are often very beautiful, since the visual properties of acrylic is similar to glass. They are durable, easy to clean, and are generally difficult to damage. These toys often last a lifetime.
Dildo Care and Cleaning
Since it’s a good idea to clean your sex toys after each use, it’s also a good idea to consider the care and maintenance required of each type of dildo before choosing one.
In general, dildos are very easy to clean. Unlike vibrators you never have to worry about damaging a dildo’s internal parts with water – unless of course you have a vibrating dildo. Dildos can be cleaned easily by wiping them with a damp, soapy washcloth, or by rinsing them with soap and water or a good sex toy cleaner.
Some materials have specific cleaning requirements. For more on how to clean each type of material, see our “Dildo Materials” section above, or check out the quick reference cleaning guide below.
Plastic – soap and water, rubbing alcohol, sex toy cleaner
Silicone – soap and water, boiling water, sex toy cleaner
Jelly – mild soap and water, sex toy cleaner
Latex– mild soap and water, sex toy cleaner
Cyberskin – mild soap and water, Cyberskin cleaning solution, sex toy cleaner
Dildo Lubrication
Whether you’re having sex with a partner or by yourself, lubrication can be an important consideration when selecting a dildo. You want to be sure the lubrication you use is compatible with the material your dildo is made of. Since some types of lubrication can damage certain dildo materials, it is good to know the basics before you start shopping.
Water-Based Lubrication:
This is the most common form of lubrication used today. Containing mostly water, water-based lubes will not stain your clothes or sheets, are safe with all sex toys, and are often pleasant tasting. Available in both flavored and non-flavored varieties, these lubes are long lasting and easy to clean.
Silicone-Based Lubrication:
Silicone-based lubes are a high-tech version of water-based lube. All the ingredients are the same, except that silicone lubes do not contain any water and are completely waterproof. They also don’t dry out like water-based lubes do so they tend to last longer. Silicone lubricant is safe to use with all sex toys except those made of silicone. If you have a silicone toy, you must use a different type of lubrication.
Oil-Based Lubrication:
Oil-based lubes consist of common oils such as vegetable oil and is not recommended for use with sex toys. Oil-based lubes are OK for masturbation and generally considered safe for consumption, but they often leave an oily residue, can be difficult to wash off your body parts, may stain clothing and have been known to cause infection if allowed to stay in the vagina. Oil-based lubes are not compatible with latex based sex toys, condoms and some latex-based birth control devices.
Petroleum-Based Lubrication:
Petroleum-based lubes are made with mineral oil or petroleum jelly. As their name implies, petroleum-based lubes contain primarily petroleum products. While they are commonly used for masturbation and anal play, petroleum-based lubes tend to stain sheets and clothing and are not easy to wash off hands and other body parts. Petroleum-based lubes include Vaseline, baby oil and K-Y Jelly. It is important to know that Petroleum will dissolve latex, and should not be used with latex toys.